Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Quit Forcing Your Committment On Me, Blogger.

I have recently discovered that the domain host for my blog is forcing me into commitment with other blogs that share the domain.  What does this mean?  If I read your blog and I like what I see, and I think I'd like to see more, then I decide I want to "follow" you.  I will now receive an update anytime you post a new blog entry.  The concept of following is eerily beautiful as it satisfies my addiction to stalk people have an endless supply of entertaining reads that I can conquer with a minimal time commitment.  I feel I need to explain to concept of "following" to you dear readers, since only 8 of you follow me, but I know there are more of you.  Remember...I can see you.
(*Sidenote:  I feel that last sentence reaked of the desperation one would expect from a woman who writes to men in prison on a life-sentence, looking for love.  Or, perhaps more appropriately, someone who goes on "The Bachelor".  BURN!)

Where was I?  Oh yes...being raped by commitment.  I was always under the impression that when you choose to "follow" a fellow blogger there is not the expectation that this is a lifetime commitment, but apparently I was mistaken.  As a prime example, a few months back I read "The Happiness Project".  Going into it, I thought it seemed like a wonderful idea to follow the author's blog to compliment what I was going to be reading in the book.  By the time I got to the second chapter, I knew that the book and the blog were not for my taste.  Gretchen and her 'Happiness Project' needed to go (How can anyone buy into a mentality that reads:  husband doesn't clean, wife nags husband to get him to help out around house, husband and wife not happy about the nagging, solution is for wife to just do all of the things she would've otherwise nagged husband about, husband now not expected to help out and blissfully happy nagging has stopped, wife's new chores involve whatever the warden dictates after she's imprisoned for killing husband). 

So the damage had been done - I had already chosen to be a follower.  Unfortunately, this little sheep has not found a way to stray from the rest of the flock.  Blogger seems to taunt me with the option to Manage the blogs that I follow, but does not want to give me the option to delete or "un-follow" anyone who I mistakenly and perhaps blindly followed for even the shortest period of time.  Quite possibly the worst part is that blogger claims to give you the option to delete.  I follow the instructions to the letter (there I am, following again), and it turns out Blogger is just a big fat phony...the steps lead me to a dead end.

Now, everytime I log into my account I find Gretchen's blog titles that plague me with bad advice.  
Suffer for fifteen Minutes? Only if I read that post!
Cultivate a Shrine? Leads me to believe she's trying to start a cult.  A Happiness cult - a name that is very misleading...not unlike Fellowship of the Sun, those murderous son-of-a-bitches.
7 Tips To Arrive on Time?  Tell that to my period. Just Kidding! 
Do You Fall Into the Trap of Overthinking?  I think this post is proof enough of that.   
Re-Evaluate Your Mantra?  How about re-evaluate my 'following' criteria?

Damn you, Blogger!

1 comment:

PorkStar said...

I know there is away to unfollow certain blogs. I did a blog clean up a while ago and deleted a bunch of fake followers. If only I could remember how, since it is time for me to do it again.